Last night I got an email from someone that started with “Divya you’re wonderful. Thank you for celebrating what has always felt like others have punished me for” and ended with “I appreciate you so much — thank you for being a shining example of who I want to be — someone who trusts every moment as perfect.” (The middle was subject specific content, unrelated to the purpose of this post).
Confession: whilst my deepest Self does indeed know every moment is perfect, my human self doesn’t ALWAYS get the memo immediately and sometimes she forgets to trust. So whilst I don’t claim to be someone who trusts EVERY moment as perfect, I do certainly aspire to be. I’m grateful that this perception of me rings true with my deepest heart’s desire. And I’m grateful that this is so for the overwhelming majority of my experience.
Even in the moments I feel hugely stretched, the wisdom within sits quietly in the knowing – this is a gift. Don’t wait until you come out the other side to appreciate it. Breathe into it and allow yourself to appreciate it now. See the brilliance in the chaos.
I’ve been practicing this for years, so most of the time, it happens easily and organically. When my marriage ended four years ago and I felt dazed and confused, lost and listless, and inspite of my grief, my ever-present mantra was “this is a gift.” I repeated it until I believed it and when I fully believed it, it quickly became my reality.
Mikeys stepped into the space created and our connection, deeper and more intimate than with any other being I had ever known, made it very clear to me why the Universe shoved Kevin aside in the way it did. And in hindsight I was awestruck by the magic in the unfolding…How I came to live 100 meters from my office in the heart of Sydney in a gorgeous light filled apartment. How I had attracted a man whose humor and stubbornness represented the bits I found most challenging to love in my brother and in my father. It was like the Universe offered me a do-over. Like a video game when you get a second life to have another go and make different choices. My whole life feels like that much of the time.
You see, many people think that gratitude/trust/faith are outlooks that some folks have and others don’t. This is simply not so. Like all of our attitudes, they are cultivated by the thoughts we think. Brain training is what helps us focus on neural networks we want to grow and strengthen, whatever those may be.
Mine IS gratitude for the gift ever-present in each moment. Recently I was in moment where I was feeling stretched and Deb Maes asked me this glorious question, “If the Universe has crafted the perfect lesson for you and this is it, what is it that you are learning right now?”
I paused and contemplated. Patience. Tolerance. Steadiness. Collaboration. Negotiation. Maturity. Non-attachment. Presence. These are the lessons that came to mind. They are what I’m more fully embodying in this season in Tamworth. And as challenging as I might experience them from time to time, I do fully trust they are indeed the most perfect lessons for me right now. As was that innocent line in that email, calling me home to my truth.